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Shabbat Shalom 9/7/13 (Yom Teruah / Rosh HaShanah)

In Batyah's Blog | on September, 04, 2013 | by

FOR ROSH HASHANAH ~ SIN OFFERINGS

On the Hebrew New Year, Yom Teruah/Rosh Hashanah, there is a ceremony called Tashlich.

Traditionally one goes to the ocean or a stream or river to pray and throw bread crumbs into the water. Symbolically, the fish devour their sins.

Occasionally, people ask what kind of bread crumbs should be thrown. Here are suggestions for breads which may be most appropriate for specific sins and misbehaviors:

  • For ordinary sins — White Bread
    For erotic sins — French Bread
    For particularly dark sins — Pumpernickel
    For complex sins — Multi-Grain
    For twisted sins — Pretzels
    For tasteless sins — Rice Cakes
    For sins of indecision — Waffles
    For sins committed in haste — Matzoh
    For sins of chutzpah — Fresh Bread
    For substance abuse — Stoned Wheat
    For use of heavy drugs — Poppy Seed
    For petty larceny — Stollen
    For committing auto theft — Caraway
    For timidity/cowardice — Milk Toast
    For ill-temperedness — Sourdough
    For silliness, eccentricity — Nut Bread
    For not giving full value — Shortbread
    For jingoism, chauvinism — Yankee Doodles
    For excessive irony — Rye Bread
    For unnecessary chances — Hero Bread
    For telling bad jokes/puns — Corn Bread
    For war-mongering — Kaiser Rolls
    For dressing immodestly — Tarts
    For causing injury to others — Tortes
    For lechery and promiscuity — Hot Buns
    For promiscuity with gentiles — Hot Cross Buns
    For racist attitudes — Crackers
    For sophisticated racism — Ritz Crackers
    For being holier than thou — Bagels
    For abrasiveness — Grits
    For dropping in without notice — Popovers
    For over-eating — Stuffing
    For impetuosity — Quick Bread
    For indecent photography — Cheesecake
    For raising your voice too often — Challah
    For pride and egotism — Puff Pastry
    For “buttering up” your boss or others — Brownies
    For being overly smothering — Angel Food Cake
    For laziness — Any long loaf
    For trashing the environment — Dumplings

Wishing you and yours a wonderful and PEACEFUL New Year.

As they say in Hebrew:

L’shana Tova Tikatevu (L’shah-nah Toe-vah Teak-ah-tay-voo)!!!
May your name be inscribed (in the book of life) for a good year!!!

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